Coping with the stress

This stuff is really hard to deal with. It seems like every day, there is more bad news. If you want to keep fighting for justice and rights, you have to take care of yourself. Keeping body and mind and soul together is essential for the long haul. We all need to take breaks and focus on our well-being so we can stay engaged and take the actions we need to take.

A clinical psychologist who specializes in dealing with narcissists offered this insight (and more in a very good article):

The nervous system can only take so much. Fight (rage), flight (escape planning), freeze (paralysis), fawn (capitulation) and flop (hopelessness) are natural survival responses — but they also keep us stuck. Healing — in therapy and in democracy — begins by recognizing when we’re trapped in these states and learning how to return to grounded, organized action.

Film director Michael Moore summed up the personal perspective well:

This morning I have been pondering a nearly forgotten lesson I learned in high school music. Sometimes in band or choir, music requires players or singers to hold a note longer than they actually can hold a note. In those cases, we were taught to mindfully stagger when we took a breath so the sound appeared uninterrupted. Everyone got to breathe, and the music stayed strong and vibrant.

Yesterday, I read an article that suggested the administration’s litany of bad executive orders (more expected on LGBTQ next week) is a way of giving us “protest fatigue” – we will literally lose our will to continue the fight in the face of the onslaught of negative action. Let’s remember MUSIC.

Take a breath. The rest of the chorus will sing. The rest of the band will play. Rejoin so others can breathe. Together, we can sustain a very long, beautiful song for a very, very long time. You don’t have to do it all, but you must add your voice to the song. With special love to all the musicians and music teachers in my life.

What can you do when you take a break from defending democracy? Here are a few ideas:

Observe a "Media fast." Just turn it all off for 24 hours (or more). Manage your media diet, and stop "compulsive scrolling... through the gloomcycle of news."
Reconnect with real people, including family, friends, faith communities, support groups.
Reconnect with nature. Take a short walk or a long hike. Garden. Spend time with your pets. Feed the birds. Soak in a natural spa.
Volunteer. Spend some time working with a good, local cause.
Release your frustration. Exercise. Yell into a pillow. Recycle glass (handy location at Siler and Agua Fria) and listen as the glass breaks.

What is working for you? Help us build out this page. Share your ideas and experience with us by email. And watch this page for more good ideas and resources.

To read more on the relationship between self-care and defending democracy, here's a great article from Ruth Ben-Ghiat, a leading scholar of totalitarianism:

This is the message of resilience: resist the deluge as best you can, and then recover your strength and return to your activities.

"Keep calm, be patient, preserve your energy, organize, and pick your current battles well," advises the Indian journalist Satyen K. Bordoloi, based on his experience with Prime Minister Narendra Modi. That is easier to do if your body is rested, your mind not clouded with dread and fear, and you do not feel alone in your struggle.

Why do we "doomscroll" and how can we manage that better?